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http://au.reachout.com/find/articles/an-abusive-relationship This offers tips on what to do / say to convince someone why they shouldn't remain in an abusive relationship. The problem with abusive relationships is that people who have been abused for so long see the abuse as being normal, a one off, or are scared of what happens if they leave. There are Australian domestic violence services (Rape Crisis Centre, Mens Line, Centre Against Sexual Assault Crisis, Police/Ambulance/Fire Brigade is 000)

http://www.heart-2-heart.ca/men/The Excellent advice on how abused men can leave violent relationships. The advice can also apply to abused women, and people of other genders. It covers safety, legal and financial issues, evidence documenting the abuse (photos, affidavits, journal/diary), contact details of domestic violence services, financial documents (credit card/mortgage/insurance/investment documents, your Will). This also offers great advice on how to convince someone to leave an abusive relationship and not be fooled when the abuser pretends to have changed their ways.

Also, something important to keep in mind: Domestic violence is a Child Protection issue. Many domestic violence situations (more than fifty percent) involve child neglect or child abuse. In Australia, children witnessing/hearing domestic violence is considered a form of abuse.
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Trayce Shaw's helpful youtube videos to straight people and GLBTIQ people (on having GLBTIQ friends, coming out, dealing with bullying and homophobia):

http://www.youtube.com/user/TrayceShaw

The Tyra Banks show has many invaluable episodes on important issues people from all walks of life face (teen dating abuse (domestic violence), homophobia, advice from doctors, racism, harm caused by prostitution)
http://www.youtube.com/my_favorites?feature=mhw4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fx3SrhmqOtQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=10fJ1h5xDaA

Anti Pornography blog: Youtube account with loads of videos. These onlione videos reveal the ugly truth about how pornography creates demand for prostitution and sex trafficking: http://www.youtube.com/user/AntiPornographyBlog
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Hello everyone,

Please go here and donate if you can to help out Stephanie:

http://community.livejournal.com/needagooddeed/6615.html

She's trying to raise money to move far away to escape an abusive ex partner. She has already taken a restraining order against him and has been to a women's shelter. Any donations or advice on where to go from here would be much appreciated. Thank you so much for helping. Even if you just spread the word.

Read below to find out more:

Hi, my name is Stephanie and I have a very small, but big wish:

I want to have the money to pay for my car and get far from where I am...
I have a restraining order on him, I've been to a battered woman's shelter (that was just ridiculous and did could do nothing to help me), but that's not going to protect me. A piece of paper can't save me.

I'm too scared to sleep at my parent's house, every small sound I hear, I jump and start to have a panic attack, thinking he's coming back.

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Disturbing news:

http://www.lookatvietnam.com/2009/12/little-interest-in-domestic-violence-law.html

For the record, I am Vietnamese Australian. And I think this is shameful.

Culture and Information Bureau official Xa Van Son said that few people in the northern province of Hoa Binh understood the law.

He attributed the ignorance to a shortage of funds to explain its contents to people through leaflets, advertisements, performances and at clubs. “I myself only found out about the law a short time ago,” he said.

Other problems cited include understanding legal language, differences in people’s cultural standards, cultural values in remote communities and disregard by local authorities on implementing the law.

Chairwoman of Lai Chau Province Women’s Union Mai Thi Hong Van said local leaders were not pleased about condemning domestic violence in the media since they saw it as exposing bad nature for others to see.


Hiding domestic violence isn't going to make it go away (quite the reverse). I am sick of people thinking that domestic violence is a private issue that ought to be swept under the rug. It is not private, it is personal for all of us. It hurts many of us. It hurts women, men, people of other genders and children. It hurts families.

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Who to contact and where io go and wat to do if you experience domestic violence in the Phillipines:

http://filipinaimages.com/where-do-filipina-women-seek-help-for-domestic-abuse-violence/

Excellent suggestions on what changes the government and the law must carry out to reduce domestic violence in the Phillipines:

http://www.unifem-eseasia.org/resources/others/domesticviolence/PDF/Philippines.pdf

Women advocates have been lobbying for a law on domestic violence for almost a decade, but the Philippine Congress has yet to enact one. The passage of a law on domestic violence will address the issue on the following fronts:

first, it is a recognition that violence in the home, particularly genderbased violence, is a social concern, not merely a private one.

Second, it will provide the impetus for setting standard government responses to cases of domestic violence – from the national agencies to the barangay (the lowest political unit in the country). Third, it will help in preventing further harm and ensuring the safety of the victims with comprehensive provisions on protective orders, civilian arrest, and the like. Fourth, additional measures will be instituted to help the victim recover and establish a life free from violence and abuse.

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Ideas on how to combat domestic violence in the Phillipines at a widespread level. Fighting domestic violence successfully must involve all aspects of government and law enforcementworking together:

http://www.synergos.org/bridgingleadership/04/d_2_case_study_tessie_fernandez_philippines.pdf

The info is extremely invaluable (especially from page 9 onwards):

Getting the police to address domestic violence properly:

Rape cases were different altogether. The police had to record these incidents because rape was clearly a criminal offense and more "controversial" in nature. One time, the police called to say that the woman Lihok-Pilipina sent over merely kept on crying and refused to talk. They had scolded and needled her, so a Lihok-Pilipina staff reported. This made Tessie Fernandez livid.

Eventually, she arranged for the traumatized woman to be interviewed in the Women's Support and Crisis Center with a police officer present. She instructed the policeman not to speak a word and to attest merely that the woman's sworn statement was made in his presence.

Tired of what she called an "anti-woman system" and the organization’s many battles with the police, Ms. Fernandez approached the Police Chief in charge of staff development and offered to train the police on gender sensitivity. The Chief was interested but confessed that they had no budget for such. Ms. Fernandez sought the help of the Mayor instead, and received initial funding. Soon, gender sensitivity trainings were conducted one after the other for the police force of Cebu City.


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Read this.

"Abolishing Prostitution: The Swedish Solution
An Interview with Gunilla Ekberg
by the Rain and Thunder Collective
First published in Rain and Thunder: A Radical Feminist Journal of Discussion and
Activism, Issue 41, Winter Solstice 2008."

Read the whole article here:

http://action.web.ca/home/catw/attach/R%26T_Interview_with_Gunilla_Ekberg.pdf

From the article:

The other principle is that women in prostitution shouldn’t be criminalized - because
they are victims of male violence. Rather, it is the perpetrators — the pimps, traffickers,
and prostitution buyers — who should be criminalized. In Sweden, prostituted women
and children are seen as victims of male violence who do not risk legal or other penalties.

If you analyze choice you recognize that choice is only possible if you choose from equal alternatives. You have to distinguish between making a decision and having a genuine choice. We make decisions in all kinds of situations that are difficult because that’s part of everyday life. If I’m in a job I absolutely loathe, that pays badly, I may have to stay there. So I make a decision to stay there because I can’t get another job right now. That is not to have a real choice.


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Hi all,

Check out the following Domestic Violence links here:

http://www.dvrc.org.au/ Info on Domestiv Violence in Australia

http://www.dvconnect.org/ free DV help for people in Queensland, Australia


http://www.iwdvs.org.au/  The Immigrant Women's Domestic Violence Service

http://www.dvsa.asn.au/cgi-bin/wf3.pl Domestic Violence services in South Australia

http://www.speakout.org.au/ From the IWSA website: "Immigrant Women's Speakout Association is the peak advocacy, information/referral and research body representing the ideas and issues of immigrant and refugee women in NSW.The Association also undertakes community development projects and provides direct services including in the areas of domestic violence and employment, education and training. Speakout is a community-based organisation, managed by women of non-English speaking background."

http://www.salvationarmy.org.au/SALV/LANDING/PC_60248.html Salvation Army (provides refuges and childcare facilities for DV survivors

http://ssdv.acon.org.au/gethelp.htm List of helpful links on services (accommodation, counselling, homelessness, Legal Aid) for people experiencing same sex domestic violence.
 

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Pretty Bird Woman House is a Sioux Domestic Violence and Rape Shelter, and it urgently needs help. The building this shelter was housed in was vandalized by thieves who smashed through the walls so often in the process of stealing nearly everything that it became unsafe for anyone to stay there. Somebody has also torched the building the day after they moved out. So this is why Pretty Bird Woman House needs a new house. PBWH provides emergency shelter, advocacy support, and educational programs for women on the Standing Rock reservation who have been victims of domestic violence or sexual assault.

The following text in italics is from the Pretty Bird Woman House site (http://www.prettybirdwomanhouse.blogspot.com/):

Jackie Brown Otter created The Pretty Bird Woman House after the brutal rape and murder of her sister, whose Lakota name means Pretty Bird Woman.

Pretty Bird Woman House services are badly needed; according to the Amnesty International report Maze of Injustice - The failure to protect Indigenous women from sexual violence in the USA:



High levels of sexual violence on the Standing Rock Sioux Reservation take place in a context of high rates of poverty and crime. South Dakota has the highest poverty rate for Native American women in the USA with 45.3 per cent living in poverty. The unemployment rate on the Reservation is 71 per cent. Crime rates on the Reservation often exceed those of its surrounding areas. According to FBI figures, in 2005 South Dakota had the fourth highest rate of "forcible rapes" of women of any US state.


Making things worse, Standing Rock Reservation has a tiny police force to patrol all 2.3 million acres. At the time of the murder of Pretty Bird Woman, Standing Rock had only one police officer on duty during the night shift. As a result, it took over a day for anyone to even come out to start to investigate the disappearance.

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